7dp3dt

Been keeping busy this week. Trying not to dwell on the what-ifs. Praying every night that the embryos are snuggling in my uterus wall (I specifically say that so that they don't snuggle elsewhere). Staying sane so far.

We leave tomorrow to go to Snowmass for a chili cook off. I got the okay from my nurse that the elevation won't be a factor and that I can even go swimming in the heated pool! She said to make sure I take breaks and walk around during the drive, which is between 5-6 hours.

We'll get back Sunday evening, so I'm hoping I won't give much thought to testing the entire weekend. I'll go in on Monday for the first beta, and again on Wednesday for the second. Monday I'll be so busy with doing laundry and putting everything away from our trip that I won't (hopefully) be able to think about the results. I'll be super busy at work Tuesday and Wednesday, which is a plus.

When I went in for my P4 blood work this morning, I asked my friend that works there if she can call me with the results, and she said no. Dang it, I have to wait!

I told Hubby this morning that he needs to hide the pee sticks so I'm not tempted to test before the betas. After peeing this morning, I pulled out my drawer where I have them, and was thinking how easy it would be to test (of course, not then as I had already peed). That's why I asked him to hide the tests.

Rest assured, though, that if we do get a positive beta, I'll be peeing on my digital test so that I can actually have a stick that says "Pregnant."

3dp3dt - :0)

Heh, that's the first time I've ever gotten to say that! Well, except for when Nancy and I were texting this morning. Just how cool is that? Three days past three day transfer.

Hubby has been cute. Making sure that I don't over-extend myself. He wasn't too sure that I should go out to lunch yesterday as he didn't want me going up and down the stairs, but I took them slow and easy. It was good to get out, as I was getting a bit stir crazy. Today he asked me to change my shorts, as he thought the ones I was wearing were too tight, even though they weren't.

We were watching the original "Breakfast at Tiffany's" this afternoon and he thought we should name our daughter after the main character. No, not "Holly" but "LuluMay." Ugh, I don't think so!

Yesterday it was so weird, with the nausea, I mean. I felt like that all day, even before I gave myself the booster shot. I think I was just reacting to the PIO, and maybe even the hcg. Who knows?

Tomorrow I'll be going to church. It's the last day of bed rest, but I'll be sure to take it easy. We're having a going away pot luck lunch for a couple in the church who is moving to Denver. I don't want to miss wishing them well.

I've been debating whether to put up a picture of the embryos or not. I feel like I want to keep them to myself right now. We've shown our mothers and one of my friends, but that's about it. I just want to hold them tight for now, if that makes any sense. Plus, we don't have a scanner so I'd have to take a photo of them and post that, so the quality wouldn't be that great.

Hubby and I have been talking about when, and if, we'll test. Our betas aren't until 6/8 & 6/10. I'm having the tests done here in town, but the doc won't get the hormone results (P4 & E2) until the day after, but he'll get the hcg result the same day. Their policy is not to call with the results until after the 2nd test, to see the the beta is properly increasing. So maybe I'll test then, who knows? I've got plenty of time between now and then to change my mind a million times.

My body is jacking with my mind

So, AF should be here any time now. Last night, I thought she showed up. However, it seems like it was just enough to be noticed on the TP, as today there is nothing.

I don't normally spot first with AF, it's boom, she's here. Then after a couple of days, it dwindles to spotting. This is my second period while I've been on DHEA, and I'm wondering if maybe the DHEA is effecting my period? Or is it something else?

It can't be implantation spotting, could it? It'd be way too late. Even if it were late implantation, this would still be way late.

See what I mean? My mind wants to believe this crap. Or maybe it's my heart. Actually, it probably is my heart, cause I know in my head that this has to be AF, she's just teasing me (torturing me). Stupid AF. Stupid clomid. Stupid heart. Stupid DHEA.

Damn this emotional roller coaster. Last night I blew up (well, self-imploded, really) because I didn't get anything for Valentine's Day. I said something about it and Hubby responded, but he thinks it's okay in his head. However, to me, it's like a slap in the face. I made him a homemade Valentine's coupon book with a few lovey dovey coupons, and the other ones were like "F-bomb free day" or "grumpy free day" coupons. Plus I gave him a couple of little boxes of chocolate, one was a bear holding a baseball saying "You're a good catch" and the other was a fish saying "You're a keeper." Nothing extravagant, nothing expensive, but from the heart. What did I get? Sex, but only after I initiated it. He thinks that that was enough. Whatever. I'm sure I'll hear about it as he reads this, but good. He needs to know how I feel, as I don't do a very good job of verbalizing it. I didn't want jewelry, or expensive roses. But even just a little bouquet, or a card. Instead, he bought yellow roses from a corner street vendor and gave them to the f'ing hoochie mamas that work for him. Oh, I'm about to explode again. I've got to get back to work.

Monday ramblings

I bought a new stove and it was delivered on Saturday. It's a Ken.more that I bought from Se.ars. While the outside of the stove is the exact same size as my other one or any normal range, the inside is HUGE! It's a 5.8 cu ft convection oven, it has a warming tray below that I can put food or plates in to keep warm. It's a glass top with five burners. Much easier to keep clean than my other stove with the coil burners. And the oven is self-cleaning! One feature that it has is a Sabbath/Jewish Holiday setting. I'm not exactly sure how that works, but since I'm not Jewish, I guess it doesn't matter.

I gave our old stove to Hubby's Aunt & Uncle who live down the street. Their old stove was going out, and since our stove was perfectly functioning (except it didn't clean itself), I gave it to them.

I made Hubby a very yummy dinner last night. Roasted herb chicken with roasted vegetables. Oh, let me tell you, if you have to buy just one cookbook, make it the red checkered Bett.er Hom.es and Gar.dens cookbook. That thing rocks! It has some of the best everyday, normal cooks (i.e. non-gourmet), recipes in there. I have leftovers for lunch today, woohoo!

Tonight we're going over to Hubby's Aunt's to celebrate his cousin's return from the war. I haven't seen Levi (his cousin) yet, but Hubby did when Levi came into his restaurant to eat. Hubby said that he ate and ate and ate! lol I guess you just don't get good Pueblo Mexican food while you're in Iraq/Afghanistan.

Tomorrow night after work I'm going to get my hair done. My roots have grown to the point that they need immediate attention. It wouldn't be so bad if they were just my natural color, however, my natural color is 60% gray, so therefore it needs covering, and pronto! I'm debating whether to cut my hair short again, or let it continue to grow. It's about chin length now all the way around (although it's still layered), where I had the back cut very short so I could easily fluff it up. We'll see how I feel tomorrow.

Two more days and I think I might use a HPT. Maybe. Or I might just wait some more. I don't expect AF until around the 24th. Maybe I'm just being delusional thinking I even have a chance. However, I did start taking my pre-natals again, as I had stopped them (I actually ran out and just hadn't bought any). We'll see what happens.

October is going to be a busy month for us. We're going to New Mexico the first weekend to see the winner of last year's America's Got Talent (or whatever the name of that show is). It was a ventriloquist. My MIL wants to see him, so that is our Christmas present for the year. Then we'll be in Las Vegas for the ICS world's championship chili cookoff. Hubby will go hunting after we get back (which means I'll be home alone -ugh, I hate when he's gone overnight). Busy, busy month.

Okay, time to quit rambling now. Have a great Monday!

P.S. Desparate Housewives starts up on Sunday! Yes!!!!

MIA

I'm about to embark on a series of trips over the next 10 days. I'll be gone tomorrow for work in Colorado Springs. Then I head up to Denver on Friday for my aunt's life partner's funeral and my cousin's wedding. Saturday I'll meet up with some of the ColoBloggers for a brunch, then visit with my aunt before heading back to town.

Will only be here for about 24 hours before I head off to the Western Slope for a work trip, ending on Wednesday. I'll be in town for a day before we go up to Winter Park for a chili cook off! Back the next Monday.

I'll be busy in my two week wait. Yes! That's right! I finally after almost 10 months have a two week wait!!!!! I wonder when I'll POAS? Or start poking my boobs? Or start analyzing and obsessing over every twinge in my abdomen?