A lot has happened in the past 500 blogs posts. Also, a lot has not happened.
I've taken clomid to try to have a baby. I didn't get pregnant.
I went through three separate IVF attempts with Dr. Slick. I never made it to retrieval.
I switched REs to Dr. S at Conceptions. Made it to both retrieval and transfer. I didn't get pregnant.
I was told to lose weight. I got the lapband and I've lost 75 pounds (well, okay, 72 pounds as I'm backsliding right now). I'm not pregnant.
I'm 39 years old and getting older. My old eggs are getting even older. Chances of me getting pregnant on my own and with my own eggs? One in 100 billion. I have better chances of winning the lottery. Perhaps I should start buying my tickets.
But you know what, with all that hasn't happened, there is a lot that has happened.
My Hubby and I are a lot closer now than we ever have been. When you go through a painful time in life, you do one of two things: you either fall apart or draw closer together. We've done the latter. We have each other's backs more now than we ever did. We protect the other now more than we used to. We are a buffer for each other when needed.
I'm a lot healthier than I used to be. I'm feeling really good. I look a lot better. I feel a lot sexier, just ask Hubby.
So while I may not yet have a baby in my arms, I have been blessed in other areas. For that I am grateful.
You never know what life may hand you. Maybe I will win that lottery. Maybe I won't. Either way, I'll be here. Living a good life. Loving a good man. Being loved in return. That's what counts. Wanting what you have and more importantly, enjoying what you have. The rest is just icing on the cake.
Which reminds me of a bumper sticker I saw:
If the cake's no good, what good is the icing?
